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Henry VIII

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Shakespeare knew like few others how to dramatize the gossipy lives of kings. More importantly, he knew that just because it was history, that didn't mean it was boring. Today, however, Shakespeare's histories can be a bit of a drudge to plow through. Let BookCaps help with this modern translation of the classic history play.

If you have struggled in the past reading Shakespeare, then BookCaps can help you out. This book is a modern translation of Henry VIII.

The original text is also presented in the book, along with a comparable version of both text.


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Excerpt

SCENE I. London. An ante-chamber in the palace. 
 Enter NORFOLK at one door; at the other, BUCKINGHAM and ABERGAVENNY

BUCKINGHAM

Good morrow, and well met. How have ye done

Since last we saw in France?

Good day, and welcome. How have you been

since we last met in France?

NORFOLK

I thank your grace,

Healthful; and ever since a fresh admirer

Of what I saw there.

Very well, thank you

your Grace; and I have not lost my admiration

for what I saw there.

BUCKINGHAM

An untimely ague

Stay'd me a prisoner in my chamber when

Those suns of glory, those two lights of men,

Met in the vale of Andren.

An inconvenient fever

kept me a prisoner in my room when

those two glorious suns, those examples to mankind,

met in the Vale of Andren.

NORFOLK

'Twixt Guynes and Arde:

I was then present, saw them salute on horseback;

Beheld them, when they lighted, how they clung

In their embracement, as they grew together;

Which had they, what four throned ones could have weigh'd

Such a compounded one?

Between Guynes and Arde:

I was there at the time, and saw them greet each other on horseback;

I saw how when they dismounted they hugged

each other, as if they were a single being;

if they were, what four Kings could have matched

one such combination?

BUCKINGHAM

All the whole time

I was my chamber's prisoner.

I was confined to my room

the whole time.

NORFOLK

Then you lost

The view of earthly glory: men might say,

Till this time pomp was single, but now married

To one above itself. Each following day

Became the next day's master, till the last

Made former wonders its. To-day the French,

All clinquant, all in gold, like heathen gods,

Shone down the English; and, to-morrow, they

Made Britain India: every man that stood

Show'd like a mine. Their dwarfish pages were

As cherubins, all guilt: the madams too,

Not used to toil, did almost sweat to bear

The pride upon them, that their very labour

Was to them as a painting: now this masque

Was cried incomparable; and the ensuing night

Made it a fool and beggar. The two kings,

Equal in lustre, were now best, now worst,

As presence did present them; him in eye,

Still him in praise: and, being present both

'Twas said they saw but one; and no discerner

Durst wag his tongue in censure. When these suns--

For so they phrase 'em--by their heralds challenged

The noble spirits to arms, they did perform

Beyond thought's compass; that former fabulous story,

Being now seen possible enough, got credit,

That Bevis was believed.

Then you missed

a sight of glory on earth: men might say

that grandeur was single up to now, before it married

one even greater. Every successive day

showed greater pageantry than the rest, until the last one

combined everything that had gone before. One day the French,

all glittering with gold, outshone the English

like heathen gods; and the next day

the English would display the riches of India; every man

look like a goldmine. Their little pages looked

like cherubim, all gilded: the ladies too,

unused to labour, were almost sweating to carry

the riches upon them, so that their work

brought colour to their cheeks. So this show

would be called unbeatable; and the next night

it looks like the work of a foolish beggar. The two kings,

equal in glory, were now the best, then the worst,

depending whose turn it was: with them

both there to be seen they were praised equally,

men said they could only see one king, and no

observer dared to voice any criticism. When these suns

(for that's what they call them) were challenged by their heralds

to joust with each other, they did it

better than one could imagine, they were so good

that it was now seen how former feats of arms,

previously thought legendary, could have been true.

BUCKINGHAM

O, you go far.

Oh, you're being very effusive.

NORFOLK

As I belong to worship and affect

In honour honesty, the tract of every thing

Would by a good discourser lose some life,

Which action's self was tongue to. All was royal;

To the disposing of it nought rebell'd.

Order gave each thing view; the office did

Distinctly his full function.

As God is my witness and as I

worship honesty, I tell you that

there are not words good enough to describe

the things that went on. Everything was royal;

nothing was spared in showing it,

everything was in its place: the officials did

their tasks perfectly.

BUCKINGHAM

Who did guide,

I mean, who set the body and the limbs

Of this great sport together, as you guess?

Who ran the show,

I mean, who ordered all the elements

of this great business, do you think?

 

NORFOLK

One, certes, that promises no element

In such a business.

One who you most certainly wouldn't imagine

would have the skills for such a business.

BUCKINGHAM

I pray you, who, my lord?

Tell me, who, my lord?

NORFOLK

All this was order'd by the good discretion

Of the right reverend Cardinal of York.

Everything was done under the orders

of the right reverend Cardinal of York.

 

BUCKINGHAM

The devil speed him! no man's pie is freed

From his ambitious finger. What had he

To do in these fierce vanities? I wonder

That such a keech can with his very bulk

Take up the rays o' the beneficial sun

And keep it from the earth.

A curse on him! There is no pie in which

he doesn't have his ambitious fingers. What was his

business with these extravagances? I'm amazed

that such a lump is able to occupy

the King so much and keep him from

the general public.

NORFOLK

Surely, sir,

There's in him stuff that puts him to these ends;

For, being not propp'd by ancestry, whose grace

Chalks successors their way, nor call'd upon

For high feats done to the crown; neither allied

For eminent assistants; but, spider-like,

Out of his self-drawing web, he gives us note,

The force of his own merit makes his way

A gift that heaven gives for him, which buys

A place next to the king.

Surely, Sir,

there's a reason that he's like this;

he is not supported by great ancestry,

which gives descendants examples to follow, nor is he

valued for great acts done on behalf of the Crown;

nor is he related to great ministers; but, like a spider,

he gets his position from his own self-made web,

he makes his way by his own merits,

the gift that heaven has given him, which buys him

a place next to the King.

ABERGAVENNY

I cannot tell

What heaven hath given him,--let some graver eye

Pierce into that; but I can see his pride

Peep through each part of him: whence has he that?

If not from hell the devil is a niggard,

Or has given all before, and he begins

A new hell in himself.

I don't know

what heaven has given him–let someone more

experienced look into that; but I can see his pride

shining out of every part of him: where has he got that from?

If not from hell then the devil is miserly,

or has given away all his pride, and Wolsey begins

a new hell himself.

BUCKINGHAM

Why the devil,

Upon this French going out, took he upon him,

Without the privity o' the king, to appoint

Who should attend on him? He makes up the file

Of all the gentry; for the most part such

To whom as great a charge as little honour

He meant to lay upon: and his own letter,

The honourable board of council out,

Must fetch him in the papers.

Why the devil did he,

at the start of this French expedition, assume,

without the King's knowledge, the responsibility of choosing

who should go with him? He chose which

gentlemen should go; mostly those on whom

he intended to impose a great tax without

giving them any honour: they were ordered to come

by his own letter, he didn't bother consulting with

the honourable board of Council.

ABERGAVENNY

I do know

Kinsmen of mine, three at the least, that have

By this so sickened their estates, that never

They shall abound as formerly.

I know

at least three relatives of mine who have

had to spend so much on this business that

their estates will never recover.

 

BUCKINGHAM

O, many

Have broke their backs with laying manors on 'em

For this great journey. What did this vanity

But minister communication of

A most poor issue?

O, many

have acquired a great deal of property

through this expedition. What use was this extravagance

apart from stealing away the

inheritance of children?

 

NORFOLK

Grievingly I think,

The peace between the French and us not values

The cost that did conclude it.

I'm sorry to say,

the peace concluded between the French and us is not worth

the price we paid for it.

BUCKINGHAM

Every man,

After the hideous storm that follow'd, was

A thing inspired; and, not consulting, broke

Into a general prophecy; That this tempest,

Dashing the garment of this peace, aboded

The sudden breach on't.

After the hideous storm that followed the

signing of the peace every man became inspired,

and spontaneously everyone began to prophesy

that the storm, raging against the peace, showed

that it would be broken.

NORFOLK

Which is budded out;

For France hath flaw'd the league, and hath attach'd

Our merchants' goods at Bourdeaux.

And this has come to fruition;

for France has broken the deal, and has seized

our merchants' goods at Bordeaux.

 

ABERGAVENNY

Is it therefore

The ambassador is silenced?

Does that mean

the ambassador has been prevented from speaking?

NORFOLK

Marry, is't.

It certainly does.

ABERGAVENNY

A proper title of a peace; and purchased

At a superfluous rate!

A fine thing to call peace; and bought

at such a high price!

BUCKINGHAM

Why, all this business

Our reverend cardinal carried.

Why, all this business

was down to our reverend cardinal.

NORFOLK

Like it your grace,

The state takes notice of the private difference

Betwixt you and the cardinal. I advise you--

And take it from a heart that wishes towards you

Honour and plenteous safety--that you read

The cardinal's malice and his potency

Together; to consider further that

What his high hatred would effect wants not

A minister in his power. You know his nature,

That he's revengeful, and I know his sword

Hath a sharp edge: it's long and, 't may be said,

It reaches far, and where 'twill not extend,

Thither he darts it. Bosom up my counsel,

You'll find it wholesome. Lo, where comes that rock

That I advise your shunning.

If I may say so your Grace,

everyone has noticed the private disagreement

between you and the Cardinal. I advise you–

and accept it from a heart who wishes you

honour and all safety–that you consider

the cardinal's malice and his power

together; and think further that

he's not lacking ministers to carry out

his hatred. You know what he's like,

that he holds a grudge,

and I know his sword

is sharp: it's long, and one may say

it can reach far places, and where it won't reach,

he throws it. Remember my advice,

you will find it beneficial. Look, here comes the rock

that I advise you to steer clear of.

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  • Apps
    • SwipeSpeare
    • SwipeBook
    • Swipe Bible
  • Books
    • Comedies >
      • All's Well That Ends Well
      • As You Like It
      • The Comedy of Errors
      • Love's Labour Lost
      • Measure for Measure
      • The Merchant of Venice
      • The Merry Wives of Windsor
      • Much Ado About Nothing
      • A Midsummer Nights Dream
      • Pericles, Prince of Tyre
      • The Taming of the Shrew
      • The Tempest
      • Twelfth Night
      • The Two Gentlemen of Verona
      • The Two Noble Kinsmen
      • The Winter's Tale
      • The Comedies of Shakespeare
    • Histories >
      • Henry V
      • Henry IV, Part 1
      • Henry IV, Part 2
      • Henry VIII
      • King John
      • King Richard the Second
      • King Henry VI: Part One
      • King Henry VI: Part Two
      • King Henry VI: Part Three
      • Richard III
      • The Histories of Shakespeare
    • Tragedies >
      • Anthony and Cleopatra
      • Coriolanus
      • Cymbeline
      • Hamlet
      • Julius Caesar
      • King Lear
      • Macbeth
      • Othello
      • Romeo and Juliet
      • Timon of Athens
      • Titus Andronicus
      • Troilus and Cressida
      • The Tragedies of Shakespeare
    • Sonnets
    • Shakespeare's Apocrypha >
      • A Yorkshire Tragedy
    • Shakespeare the Novel >
      • Macbeth
      • Hamlet
      • The Merchant of Venice
      • Julius Caesar
      • Antony and Cleopatra
    • Lesson Plans >
      • Lesson Plans: Coriolanus
      • Lesson Plans: Othello
      • Lesson Plans: Julius Caesar
      • Lesson Plans: Romeo and Juliet
      • Lesson Plans: As You Like It
      • Lesson Plans: The Tempest
      • Lesson Plans: Hamlet
      • Lesson Plans: Macbeth
      • Lesson Plans: Richard III
      • Lesson Plans: Anthony and Cleopatra
      • Lesson Plans: Henry V
      • Lesson Plans: King Lear
      • Lesson Plans: A Midsummer's Nights Dream
      • Lesson Plans: Love's Labour's Lost
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